The first month

Post pardon depression and Nursing.

First things first:

Postpartum depression is a very real and very powerful thing.

If anybody ever suspects that they have it I highly recommend talking with your doctor.

It was explained to me in the hospital that I would be very emotional for about 2 weeks while my hormones leveled out. After that amount of time if I felt depressed, down, blue , had any thoughts of hurting myself or my baby then I should talk to a doctor.

Those 2 weeks are, well there is no better way to put it than crazy.

That's exactly what I was.

One day I would be super happy with tons of energy and then a moment later I would be crying over the fact that my baby had grown 3 inches.

I think just the part of knowing that those quick emotional changes were normal helped me out a lot.

I was able to tell myself that the crazy part was not me.

Yes I love my baby, and yes I'm sad she will grow up, but it's not so dramatic as it was in my head.

I didn't want to have to deal with hormones for a long time so I started doing some research.

I learned many things like hormones are stored in fat cells, this can be a reason why some women deal with postpartum depression for such a long time. 

I made a resolution to get the weight off. I'm not shooting for unrealistic goals, but E do want to be able to do a 5k at the end of the summer. I know it will take some work and dedication, but I'm ready for it.

Another thing I've done is gotten a massage the week after giving birth.
Because hormones are stored in fat,a deep tissue massage can get things loose and flowing. This really helped to flush my system of them.

I also learned that the foods we eat can have a big impact on us.

I've decreased my intake of dairy, meat, and processed foods and replaced them with more fresh fruits and vegetables.

Drinking plenty of water is also key to flushing out the pregnancy hormones. Think of it like a water slide, the more water the quicker they go.

One last thing that I have enjoyed is detox baths. There are a few recipes online but my favorite one includes apple cider vinegar, Epsom salts, and a few drops of lavender oil.
If you want to give it a try follow these rules:

Make sure the water is HOT and soak for 30 mins.

Make sure you sweat!

And drink lots of water before and after.

I know I have my moments of feeling blue, like I'm not qualified for this job of mom, but my husband always has my back. We talk about feelings and separate the real from the crazy and it helps me feel good.

I'm convinced that everyone experiences postpartum depression to a degree, but how we handle it can have the bigger impact.

I think my research has prepared me a lot, and I think I'm on a good path to having my hormones back to normal and under control. 

I also know not all people are the same, so these things may not work for others. Once again, if you even question if you gave postpartum depression please see your doctor, they can help you separate the crazy from reality.

The other real struggle thus past month has been nursing my baby.

I felt like we didn't have the best start. To begin with I didn't even know how long I should nurse her for, I was told she would pull away, but anyone who has ever nursed can tell you that may happen a few times before they are actually done.

This lack of feeding led to another problem, Jaundice. She wasn't eating enough to lower her bilirubin.

We had to stay an additional day so our baby could get light treatments to help decrease the bilirubin.

At that point in time we were informed that she needed to nurse for 10-15 mins on each side.

This was nearly triple the time she had been eating for.

The bilirubin and decreased amount of food caused our baby to be so sleepy and lethargic. Feedings became a game called keep the baby awake, and the baby won more often than we did.

It also became very stressful when we only had half an hour with our baby to feed her in between light treatment sessions.

When we went home we had to slightly supplement feedings to help decrease the bilirubin while my milk came in.

In the end everything worked out fine but we are still practicing this eating thing.

One other difficulty that has come up is how my eating affects her.

For the past week we would have problems because she would pull her latch off and just scream at me. Turns out it was from gas, and I realized I needed to change my diet.

This is not going to be easy because all the foods I typically enjoy can cause a baby to be very gassy.

The foods that are recommended turn out to be the stuff I think is yucky, or just don't know how to cook it.

Thanks to the Internet I've discovered a few recipes that we will be trying, but just cutting back on some foods has proven to be a good idea.

Less gas pains for baby, and one happier momma. 

If I've learned anything this past month it's that I'm always going to be learning how to do this mom thing.

Sometimes it will be by trial and error and other times it will be from advice. I just hope I'm not too stubborn to miss the learning opportunities I am given.